Remember, key to happiness are all within us. Therefore, no one can make us happy until we chose to be happy.
Have you ever thought about your relationship to people around you?
Have you ever judged yourself for not being happy with other people?
We all complain about others if we cannot be happy with them. And consistently, we repeat that same misunderstanding throughout our life. Yet we never think that the problem is within us. If we try to understand ourselves and discover our preferences, happiness will just be our slave. Though it is utterly difficult to stay happy all the time with other people albeit it’s not impossible. To stay happy around other people, you need to follow some key rules to happiness. And in the first place, these key rules demand an understanding of thyself which is the mother of all rules.
Why Can’t We Be Happy with Most of the People Around Us?
“No one is perfect and everyone is different”. In real, it is a very simple and inevitable fact about all of us. Due to our different personality, we cannot like everyone even though they are generous and friendly in nature.
Happiness is a conceptual understanding of our own instinct and if someone goes out of our structured understanding, we become unhappy with them. Similarly, everyone has a different ideology, moral and cultural ethics, belief and social barrier. As a result, each of us has conventional understanding of things in a very different way or even in our own way. For example, asking about someone’s salary might be considered as a bad manner in some culture, but in some culture, it is not. Similarly, some jokes are offensive to some people but they are not to some other people. Depending on issues like these, we complain and judge about people around us.
Rules of Key to Happiness to Stay Happy with Others
Since the beginning of the life, people have been following a set of rules to stay happy throughout their life. Time changes but the definition of happiness remains the same. And to pursue ultimate happiness, some rules has to be maintained.
Understanding Yourself is the First Key to Happiness
Oxford University Professor, Tariq Ramadan said, “The more you look into and understand yourself. The less Judgmental you become”. So, understanding yourself will solve the problem mostly.
Important people like Family, relatives and friends are always there for us and we often have trouble with them. Because of their suggestion or interference, we take them wrong and start complaining. Or we pick people for friendship and if they do not match our ideology, we become unhappy. And its nothing more than a feeling of being ignored.
In order to have a healthy relationship, understanding our own preference is very important. Therefore, you have to try to understand, what type of people you are comfortable with. You must perceive your expectation.
Learn to Judge Yourself
Instead of judging others action or habit, learn to judge yours. More often, we become judgmental to most of the people. Apparently, we see it among couples. For example, some actions seem bad when your partner does. On the contrary, that same thing or even more considerable action is not wrong to you. What does it mean actually? It means, you have a contradiction with your own belief and start judging others. Also remember that despite your self-judging nature, you can’t judge others action unless you know their story properly.
Along with better self-understanding, we also have to understand others. As we can have our own, they can have theirs. So, before we become judgmental, understanding them is important. We often encounter some changes in some people around us. And no matter how close they are, we start disliking their changes. More importantly, observe them and then take the necessary action. If possible, put yourself in their shoe, before you feel unhappy.
Respect Other’s Belief
Respecting others is an important key to happiness. Superiority complex makes us believing that our belief is the only logical and right one. Conversely, it says that belief of others is not right. To put it in other word, we disrespect others belief. To stay happy with other people around you, respect their belief. It doesn’t mean you have to accept theirs rather you have to respect. Be flexible to others and do not force them to accept yours. Still you have option of logical reasoning.
Accept Cultural Differences
Cultural diversity makes the world more colorful. For this reason, we are alive and have many things to learn. As I have discussed earlier, same habit, belief, joke or manner can have different perspective in different culture and society. Suppose one of your friends does not feel good eating Pizza instead he loves rice but you don’t like it. Even that person might not know what pizza is. What an unsmart guy!!! Isn’t he? No, rather you are an unsmart person because of your narrow minded. So, accepting cultural differences can make you happy in many ways.
Focus on Positive Leads to a Happy Life
According to science, most of the unhappy people focus on negative things only. Negative energy kills our happiness because we always deal with negative thoughts. In order to have good relationship with relatives, friends or family, think about their positive side. You don’t have to be selfish all the time. Listen to yourself as well as your closest people what they have to say. Listening and respecting their view can make them happy. But it doesn’t mean you have to do everything as they say. If you understand their purpose, you will see they want us to do well in our life. So, do not just get the negative point, see with different perspective and take the positive.
Lower Expectation is a Key to Happiness
Among all other rules this one is a very important one. Keeping your expectation low has always been a key to happiness. We meet a lot of people in our life. Initially we also have many expectations from them. In effect we become unhappy when they cannot fulfill our expectations.
To realize, you need to see it from your angle. Have to ask question, can you fulfill everyone’s expectation? No, you can’t. So how do you expect that others will be able to fulfill yours? Instead, you should keep a higher expectation from yourself. Learning to appreciate others for their effort will definitely make you feel good about them.
To conclude, happiness is a game of your own brain. And you can achieve happiness if you follow some set of rules. Before everything, understand yourself and learn to see everything from different perspective. And keep your expectation low to other people.
Eventually, this way you can become happy with people around you.