It could be a cousin, a friend, a colleague, or a girlfriend. No matter who it is, an unhealthy relationship is not good for you because it cost you a lot of positive energy. Moreover, it produces a lot of negative energy and you start to lose yourself. But people often do not understand that their relationship with a person is not healthy. So, we are going to tell you five signs of unhealthy relationships that can clear your confusion.
Let us give you a situation,
When you are in an unhealthy relationship, it simply does not feel good. You can sense that something is not right. You can also notice that when you are around them, the joy of togetherness becomes less. At those moments, it is difficult to relax and just be who you are.
If you can sense what we have just said earlier, everything indicates that you are in agreement with yourself. Besides, you do not benefit from continuing to be in the relationship.
So, we have some tips that can help you understand more clearly. If you recognize yourself in these five situations, the warning lights flash and you should consider getting away.
Five Signs of Unhealthy Relationships
1. You Are Always Defensive to Avoid Clash
This creates a lot of inner stress and unrest. You are not free to completely relax, simply because there is unpredictability in the relationship. Moreover, you always feel insecure about the person’s reaction to something you do. In this situation, without necessarily understanding why the other person may react violently to something that you do not expect. And it is very common with selfish and childish adults.
This means that your shoulders are high up, you do not breathe completely into your stomach, and are constantly on a defensive role. But everyone gets exhausted by this situation in the long run!
2. You Worry If You Should Say What You Think
If you constantly experience ending up in conflict, or there is a bad mood because you are honest about what you think, or mean, it often leads to you becoming quieter. You hold back and dare not say what you consider risky. Even, a lot of people think, it is not worth arguing with illogical people. And you should know that this is one of the signs of unhealthy relationships that you be aware of.
The sad thing is that you fail yourself because you erase who you are and adapt too much. There are good reasons why people stay in those destructive relationships.
According to research, people who experienced bad treatment as children from their loved ones, also tolerate much more of this kind of behaviour as an adult. But you can change that pattern! Yes, it is not easy, but quite possible. You get to understand that the cost of remaining in awkward relationships is devastating. In this process, you simply lose yourself. And you always remain sad because of it.
3. Your Silence Make You Feel Punished
Some are easy to keep quiet about but some are not. You worry too much about what other people will say. Or you just want to avoid being in the air by keeping yourself silent. You also tolerate body languages that ooze rejection or some other kind of ugly atmosphere. Unfortunately, there are some people who punish others by being quiet.
By silently creating distance, you can make others understand that they have done or said something wrong. And this Silence is experienced as a reaction to something, such as punishment. But it is often turned back to you. It is an uncomfortable situation to be in this mood. As a result, you feel punished by others even if they did the wrong.
So, your silence feels like a punishment to you eventually. Moreover, you don’t do anything because you have a feeling that “no matter what I say or do, it continues”. That is why you need to reply and stop keeping yourself silent in a violent situation. It eventually does nothing.
4. You Are on Other’s Terms All the Time
This point is one of the most important signs of unhealthy relationships. There is a significant number of people who talk a lot about themselves. Besides, there are people who are not good at conversations or activities. That is a different thing.
But this is at a level above. In this situation, you do everything according to what the other person wants. Thus, his / her needs are always at the centre and your wishes or interests do not fit.
In that case, there will be trouble. And then it’s easy to give in. Unfortunately, those who control others do not see that it is actually very selfish behaviour. And it is more than childish: “You can play with me, but then we just have to do what I want!” Even children avoid this type of behaviour.
But you can stop this and get away from them for your own happiness. Though it is tough for emotionally dependent people because their happiness depends on someone else. But it is not impossible to quit.
5. They Don’t Have Any Positive Change for Long
We humans can adapt and change if we want to actively support it. And if we just are a little flexible with others, we can have a healthy relationship. But there are unfortunately many who have no interest in looking at themselves. Besides, they don’t want to think about what they contribute to the relationships. This is rather one of the scariest signs of unhealthy relationships, that is not going to change over time.
Those who are dominant and act immature in a relationship, always play a “victim role”. Their attitude tells that something is wrong, but it is always someone else’s fault. That way, they will not feel the need to grab their patterns – because there is something wrong with everyone else! Thus, they are often also on the spot resting in their own development.
Now you know the most important signs of unhealthy relationships, what do you want to do?
What You Need to Do
Do you want to remain silent, or do you want to do something about the destructive relationship you have? In fact, we all have a choice as to who we spend time with. Though children are at the mercy of the other family members, adults like you always have a choice.
So, if you recognize yourself with some of these signs of unhealthy relationships and how that particular relationship is ruining you, you should be careful. Though it sounds a bit brutal – but let go! Quit it.
For your own good, you must not expose yourself to that person. It is because you know with all your heart that the relationship does not give you anything positive. Rather it only drains you. Do not get stuck in old patterns only because you feel you have to, or you should. A lot of people do not quit because they don’t want to hurt others. But you just need to remember, they don’t get hurt, you do because of them.
Therefore, if understand the signs of unhealthy relationships around you, let it go. Do what feels right for you, and focus on whether you want this relationship in your life or not. When you focus on the relationships you know you like and enjoy, you simply have a better life.